Kids Life Jacket

- parents who do not watch young kids at swimming pool and the nerve of some people?
i know this is long, please read and advise. memorial day swimming and bbq at my brothers' house. looked out the window, saw my niece's boys ages 8 and 7 at the side of the deep end of the pool (12 ft) the oldest leaned out to get a basketball out of the water. they do not know how to swim. i gasped, then was relieved when he didn't fall in. my niece (their mom) was eating and not watching them, she usually doesn't watch or supervise them well. today my sister (the boys grandmother) questioned me why i thought it was ok for them to be by the pool!!!!! hello!!!!!!! and she brought up a time when i told another family member to put a life jacket on his 4 yr old son because he took it off and was getting back in the pool. she had the audacity to ask me if i "liked" the other kid (4 yr old) better!!! it ticked me off. oh and she said i have to ask you something and asked me not to get mad about it. i replied i usually just get hurt by her questions. and i was hurt when she asked me that and felt like i had to scramble and explain myself! then i was upset about it later and texted her ok that i just would not watch any of the kids. the parents don't watch them and there are several who get in with life jackets which is just stupid to think that makes it ok. when i was a teenager i saw a little kid nearly drown because he tipped over face down and nobody was paying attention, he could have drowned. also have 2 family members (father and young son) who drowned following some flooding near their rural home. i have witnessed 2 other drownings, one was a teenager who drown a couple of summers ago while we were on vacation and the other was an elderly man who fell in water while fishing. so yes, i will say i am very cautious and frightened about the swimming pool and little kids especially because the parents are not around and not watching their kids like they should be. my 2 kids (teenagers) are good swimmers, but if they are in the water, i am there and watching. i do not leave. and i feel like the other parents take it for granted because i am cautious, it's ok to leave their non swimming kids in the pool because i am there. meanwhile they are off eating, drinking, visiting at the get together. then to be scrutinized with the questions my sister asked well! i told her maybe i just wouldn't watch any of them anymore. i'm angry and hurt. no, i didn't think it was ok for them to be poolside, but their mother knew they were out there and she never supervises them good. after the leaning over the pool to get the ball incident, my sister did go get the boys out of the gated pool area but a lot of times the gate gets opened again and does not stay shut because so many people going back and forth. ok, so advise, please and thanks for reading all this to eleanor rigby i am not tossing around the word drowned. the people i talked about did not struggle then were ok, THEY ARE DEAD. the family member and his young son were buried in the same coffin. the 16 yr old drowned after his uncle was unable to rescue him after he swam too close to the jetty in galveston island, texas. we watched lifeguards and emt's pound his chest but his skin was green and ofcourse, they were not able to revive him. the elderly man who fell into the water while fishing in fact, drowned as well. when they retrieved his body, his wife was there and did not react much, probably was in shock. yes, i know the difference between someone who drowns and someone who merely struggles in the water. to eleanor rigby i am not tossing around the word drowned. the people i talked about did not struggle then were ok, THEY ARE DEAD. the family member and his young son were buried in the same coffin. the 16 yr old drowned after his uncle was unable to rescue him after he swam too close to the jetty in galveston island, texas. we watched lifeguards and emt's pound his chest but his skin was green and ofcourse, they were not able to revive him. the elderly man who fell into the water while fishing in fact, drowned as well. when they retrieved his body, his wife was there and did not react much, probably was in shock. yes, i know the difference between someone who drowns and someone who merely struggles in the water.

A Advice: shorten your question.

- family members who do not watch their kids at the pool and have the nerve to scrutinize me !?
know this is long, please read and advise. memorial day swimming and bbq at my brothers' house. looked out the window, saw my niece's boys ages 8 and 7 at the side of the deep end of the pool (12 ft) the oldest leaned out to get a basketball out of the water. they do not know how to swim. i gasped, then was relieved when he didn't fall in. my niece (their mom) was eating and not watching them, she usually doesn't watch or supervise them well. today my sister (the boys grandmother) questioned me why i thought it was ok for them to be by the pool!!!!! hello!!!!!!! and she brought up a time when i told another family member to put a life jacket on his 4 yr old son because he took it off and was getting back in the pool. she had the audacity to ask me if i "liked" the other kid (4 yr old) better!!! it ticked me off. oh and she said i have to ask you something and asked me not to get mad about it. i replied i usually just get hurt by her questions. and i was hurt when she asked me that and felt like i had to scramble and explain myself! then i was upset about it later and texted her ok that i just would not watch any of the kids. the parents don't watch them and there are several who get in with life jackets which is just stupid to think that makes it ok. when i was a teenager i saw a little kid nearly drown because he tipped over face down and nobody was paying attention, he could have drowned. also have 2 family members (father and young son) who drowned following some flooding near their rural home. i have witnessed 2 other drownings, one was a teenager who drown a couple of summers ago while we were on vacation and the other was an elderly man who fell in water while fishing. so yes, i will say i am very cautious and frightened about the swimming pool and little kids especially because the parents are not around and not watching their kids like they should be. my 2 kids (teenagers) are good swimmers, but if they are in the water, i am there and watching. i do not leave. and i feel like the other parents take it for granted because i am cautious, it's ok to leave their non swimming kids in the pool because i am there. meanwhile they are off eating, drinking, visiting at the get together. then to be scrutinized with the questions my sister asked well! i told her maybe i just wouldn't watch any of them anymore. i'm angry and hurt. no, i didn't think it was ok for them to be poolside, but their mother knew they were out there and she never supervises them good. after the leaning over the pool to get the ball incident, my sister did go get the boys out of the gated pool area but a lot of times the gate gets opened again and does not stay shut because so many people going back and forth. ok, so advise, please and thanks for reading all this i don't think it's my job to say if its ok or not. like you said it's not my pool. i never told anyone it was ok or not it's just frustrating that they all expect me to watch their kids then scrutinize me because non swimmers were pool side well hello their mom should have been watching them i don't think it's my job to say if its ok or not. like you said it's not my pool. i never told anyone it was ok or not it's just frustrating that they all expect me to watch their kids then scrutinize me because non swimmers were pool side well hello their mom should have been watching them mr warrior, MY kids do know how to swim as i paid for private lessons with a swim coach, one on one and you bet i was there watching everyday for the summers they took instructions.

A Having children in the water, and watching them......meaning the parents watching their own children, shouldn't even be a question you have to ask or defend. Add to that, all the stress you have experienced, through the people you have known, who have lost their lives in the water. It has to elevate the concerns you rightly have for safety. Apparently they have no idea of what can happen. Even if a child doesn't drown they can be severely injured mentally as well as physically. We have a River that our family loves to visit. We started going there before our youngest was born. We had him in a life vest when he was a toddler, with all of us in the water with him. Through the years he would get another life vest as he continued to grow. We told everyone to put their children in life vests, and to always watch them. They would even come and borrow them from us, we had them in almost every size. However never experienced one that thrust the child's face forward into the water. The ones that we bought had that extra padding behind the neck so that if something did happen he could lay back and have his head supported. Maybe the life jacket was too big. Not sure why that would have happened. People need to know that a life jacket that is too big, or not fastened provides little to no help when needed. As a Mom I have great concerns for safety , especially around the water, so I completely understand your concern and frustration. If this happened to me, I would calmly tell everyone that I really enjoy watching my children swim and play, and being a part of that fun with them. Therefore I would not be able to devote the necessary constant attention that would be required to look after the other children properly. Say my kids love the time we have together, and the memories we have made throughout the years. So perhaps they could swim with their children. Tell them you bet their children would really love to spend some one on one time with them. Which you could even ask the children, wouldn't you like to swim and play in the water with your mom and dad? You don't have to defend yourself. Why are they even questioning You instead of themselves? Maybe you could do some research and give it to them. It may make them more aware of the dangers, It is better than arguing, and even more important it will keep the children safe. Your heart is in the right place, you just need to speak up for yourself. Try and do it in a way that makes the conversation low key where the whole problem is diffused. Since they seem to want to take something that they should be doing, and put it all on you. Maybe take another family member or friend with you for back up. Hopefully they will be less likely to argue with someone else around. Doesn't mean they will not get grumpy about it. I remember watching a program, where a group of Women were talking about "so called" friends that were always imposing on them. They would say can you take my kids to school, can you watch my dogs for a week, will you return this blouse to the store for me? To make things worse the so called friends did nothing for the person they were constantly asking favors of. The so called people were takers, and the ones who did all the nice tasks are givers. The expert said just tell them no. She said they will just move on to someone else who will do it. Seems they don't care who does it, just as long as someone does. Your a good Mom, hopefully you can get some of that to rub off on them. Could be this is all happening with You because the adults need to know the importance of watching their children and water safety. We never know, possibly something might have happened, but because of your shared wisdom and knowledge.......a life may be saved.